Hold Music: An Institution No One Wants Around

You know how bad hold music can be. Maybe it's because you're waiting - sometimes in vain - just to talk to another human being about some problem you'd like to just have solved already. Maybe it's because the quality of the clips your ear gets blasted with sits somewhere between a water-damaged talking toy from your childhood and a mixtape of your older brother's from 20 years ago. Whatever it is, hold music is very often bad news for your sanity and musical taste.

Oh, and don't even get me started on the times you hear a song you like being mutilated. For 20 minutes.

Well, over on Neatorama, there's been a list compiled of some truly terrible hold music samples. Have a listen, but prepare to not enjoy them. Or at least, only enjoy them ironically, like aural trainwrecks.

I almost want to ask if there's some sort of cultural niche for hold music, like Muzak. But my kneejerk reaction is to say that there is not. Hold music doesn't really bring anything to the musical conversation. If you disagree, I'd love to hear a defense for it.

Until then, I'll be on the line, waiting.

Please kill me.

Viral or Successful?

Here's an article from the Guardian that looks at whether YouTube darlings OK Go are a successful band, or just a viral video sensation.

Yes, you know their videos "Here It Goes Again" and the new big smash "This Too Shall Pass". But do you know their music? That is to say, other than these two songs, how well do you know OK Go's stuff? Did you know their new album, Of The Blue Colour Of The Sky, came out in January?

Did you know it's sold fewer than 25,000 copies in the U.S.?

So everyone heralds OK Go for representing the magic of YouTube and viral video. But that formula hasn't turned into financial success for them. I have a feeling there are more fans of OK Go's video than their music. So is the YouTube generation going to work to the benefit of the artists?

Or do we just want it all for free, and for the time being?

The Money And The Future

So maybe you've heard of this Internet thing, where a lot of people get their music for free and only sometimes get busted by the RIAA - big time. Anyway, the bottom line is that less money is being spent on music - and that means musicians aren't making as much as they used to. So how are they getting by?

According to this BBC News article, they're doing something that's unthinkable for people creative enough to carve out a music career - they're being inventive.

I know, I could hardly believe it either.

Yes, be it signed EPs and thank-you letters from Allison Weiss (for a price) or a meet-and-greet with KISS (for even more of a price), musical artists are finding ways to connect with their fans. And their money, I suppose, but let's allow ourselves to romanticize this a bit. Artists are getting to attach personal meaning to their work for their fans. Can you imagine buying a digital version of the concert you were just at? Or better yet, getting a song sung about you? We could ALL be Lucy! In the sky! WITH DIAMONDS!!!

Anyway, here's an interesting idea from French tech company MXP4's Albin Serviant: In the next 10 years, the music experience will be revitalised in the same way that 3D has revitalised movies and innovations like the Wii and Rock Band have revitalised gaming.

Just think about it for now. And feel free to pay artists a little extra for that extra touch. It's not like they don't want to let you know you matter to them.

Out Of Hibernation

Blowin' the dust off. So much, SO much, I have noted in the music world in the last 5 months, and none of it have I posted here. Most of it, I have forgotten. But I will stretch these creaky old joints and drum up what I can.

FLASH: In a table-turn so ill it would make DJ AM (R.I.P.) proud, the big-four record labels are being sued for piracy! Turns out they haven't been paying artists for using their songs in compilations. Ah, the sweet smell of hypocrisy.

Alsowise, Rolling Stone magazine just released its list of the 100 Best Albums of the Decade. I'll ruin the suspense for you now and tell you that Radiohead took top spot, with their 2000 album, Kid A. While I am currently phasing in and out of a Radiohead kick, and this album has grown on me this year in a way that if Loretta grew on me that way, I'd say, "Yeah. That's nice,"* I'm more interested in the comment section of the article.
Scroll to the bottom and you'll find a ton of comments going somewhere along the lines of this: "You forgot [album]! Where's the love for [artist]?! This list is a sell-out, too mainstream, etc."

And they're definitely onto something.

I, too, found this list to be populated not with the innovative albums, not the music that's evolving what we hear, but more mainstream, mass-audience stuff. And yes, I am aware that "best" in the music business must take into account whether or not people actually bought the album. But there also seems to be an air of the panelists going through the motions. For example, Bob Dylan's Modern Times got 8th spot. The album is solid, but the honour feels like an obligation; as if to say, Dylan's a living legend, so how could his music not still be the absolute (8th) best of the last 10 years? Never mind that his creative peak was more than 30 years ago.

Anyway, it is a symptom of best-of lists that almost every reaction will run along the same lines. We all have music that's touched us more deeply than the music on this list, and it's hard to get ourselves out of that subjectivity and define winners. Then again, the only real winners are us, the people who get to listen to it all.

If I don't post again, happy holidays! Though I sincerely hope I do.

*Family Guy quote. Sorry it's so non sequitur.

Polaris Prize: The Opposite of Downdate

The shortlist is in!

The shortlist is short!

Like this post!

It's in!

Read it!

Here!

The shortlist is in!

Surgery and Polaris Prizes, Oh My!

Where have I been for the last few weeks? Well, sometimes I be working, sometimes I be partying, and sometimes I be getting my wisdom teeth out last Friday. I am currently in recovery for that particular bit of surgery, and am moving further away from looking like this

with time. But either way you slice it, I'm not as often here and in the mindset to write a blog post in the summer. But I shall try, and this shall be a blog post. Starting... NOW.

My friend Paul basically wrote this post for me, because all I'm gonna do is let you know that the Polaris Music Prize has announced its longlist of contenders for this year's competition. What's a longlist? Well, it's the list from which the jury will choose a shortlist. And if you don't know what a shortlist is... it's a shortened version of the... never mind. Let's just say the first round of narrowing down potential winners has begun.

I believe I've already mentioned the Polaris Music Prize in a post about the Juno Awards, but just as a quick re-cap, I see it as more of an artistically-earned award than commercially. In other words, the biggest-selling artist in Canada doesn't automatically shoot to the top of the Polaris list - in fact, the jury often steers away from the big shiny acts in favour of what you might call indie groups. For example, Patrick Watson won 2 years ago, and he's never been what you would consider a superstar in the music world. If you've heard more of him - and many of us have - in the last couple years, well... you may very well have the Polaris Prize to thank, for generating the buzz around him.

Anyway, check out the Polaris website, have a look and a listen to the artists, and then sit tight in anticipation of the shortlist, being announced on July 7th. And if you're getting your wisdom teeth out this summer, as it seems a lot of people I know are, remember to take your meds, freeze your face, sleep all the time, and don't try to eat rocks right away.

Or... you know, at all.

Here's last year's Polaris winner. Enjoy!

Monopoly - It's Not Just For Real-Estate

So before I get to the Gian Ghomeshi - Billy-Bob Thornton thing, I'd like to get a bit of a rant off my chest. I listened to a podcast from HowStuffWorks.com called "Stuff From The B-Side", and the topic (which was actually from a month ago) was concert tickets. And it got me all agitated all over again. Let me explain why.

You may have heard of a little company called Ticketmaster. You mave have heard of them because almost anytime you try to buy a concert ticket, you will be dealing with Ticketmaster - usually on their website, these days. An estimated 80 percent of venues in the United States sell their tickets via Ticketmaster, but unfortunately, if I gave you a percentage of Canadian venues, it would be made up completely off the top of my head and less than trustworthy. But let's assume it's similar. Now, you may or may not have heard of Live Nation. It's possible you haven't, but they are the leading concert promoter in America. Essentially, they are responsible for signing contracts with artists, and then booking them into venues across the nation, and getting them all the fancy stuff that famous people ask for...

Here. This is what they do.



So, if you will imagine, Ticketmaster gets the people in the seats and the money to the artists, while Live Nation gets the artists on the stage... and the money to the artists (Cash money!). I don't have a problem with either part of this process occurring, since without it there would be no show. The problem is that Ticketmaster and Live Nation are each absolute giants in their respective industries - everyone who's anyone deals with these two companies. No, that's not the problem. The problem is that they're about to get married.

Or in less romantic terms, they are about to engage in a corporate merger. This deal is worth a lot, and lenders approve. I, however, do not.

A quick refresher on business monopolies: they occur when one company controls such a large share of the industry they are involved with, that other companies cannot compete. This allows said company to direct their prices however they like, and consumers can go you-know-what themselves if they don't like it.
Think about it. If the promoter is in cahoots with the ticket seller, who do you think they'll award the ticket rights to? And do you think the tickets will be sold at bare-bones prices, when there's really no way for the "competition" to compete? And if that wasn't enough... think of the scalping.

You know, when people buy a bunch of concert tickets as soon as they go on sale, and then sell them at a huge mark-up. Well, welcome to the Internet dimension. Now the scalpers can use software that snaps up, say, 500 tickets the second they go on sale on Ticketmaster's website. Then, within seconds, they can have those tickets up for sale on their own, secondary-market website, and people looking to buy tickets will be hard-pressed to find an alternative to this captive market. This would be bad enough if it was limited to eBay and Craigslist. But oh no, the big dogs have their fingers - paws? - in this pot too.

Check out TicketsNow. They offer the tickets you can't find at Ticketmaster, for an increased price. If you dig deep enough, you will find that they are a subsidiary of none other than Ticketmaster. So Ticketmaster sells these tickets to TicketsNow, which sells them again, and the profit all finds its way back home. Ticketmaster is selling those tickets. TWICE.

I apologize for the number of times the word "ticket" has appeared in this post. I'm getting paid a commission for using it. Support the little guys!

So what can we do? Well, we can stop going to concerts that Ticketmaster and/or Live Nation is profiting from. But that eliminates the vast majority of live events in North America, so... Oh! We could buy the tickets and give them away to people who couldn't afford them, as a means of protest. But then, Ticketmaster's already made their money... OH! Tell artists to boycott venues dealing with these two companies. Well, Pearl Jam tried it, but also cancelled their American tour, since that's about the same thing as only playing in places that don't deal with Ticketmaster.

So are we stuck? No. The United States Senate is holding hearings to determine if this merer would breach American anti-trust laws. I really really don't want to investigate their Constitution and find out the Legalese, but they're basically assessing the deal to see if it reeks of monopolization. I can only hope that they do indeed smell that and, with kerchief held over mouth, overturn the decision. Otherwise, be prepared to see even more hiking of ticket prices at Ticketmaster. And don't be surprised if secondary-market concert tickets reach prices in the thousands - or worse.

And if Ticketmaster and Live Nation try to push concertgoers around...

Pretty Important Questions, Y'All

Ok, I'm going to ask some questions that are related to music - sometimes only on a molecular level, but that's ok. Answer them if you'd like. Actually, answer them if I'd like... and I would. So now you have to. I think that's how it works.

Who would win in a fight between a piano and a sousaphone? Prison rules.

What do you think Mick Jagger's favourite colour is?

WHO is Carly Simon singing about in "You're So Vain"?

WHO really shot Mr. Burns?

What's a song that reminds you of each of the seasons?

LISTEN TO THIS!(He said, in the form of a question...)

For that matter, check out QTV if you're ever hankering for some cool music and a super-great Canadian radio DJ. That reminds me! Jian Ghomeshi-Billy-Bob Thornton showdown, in an upcoming post. I'll be honest, these summertime blues have my blog-sense out of whack, but if you complain enough I'll do what I can.

The Hazards Of Love

If you're anything like me, your listening tastes slide back and forth between exploring new music and sinking into stuff you know and love. I know that financial constraints keep me from the first option more than I'd like, but I try and hear stuff I've never heard before. And sometimes, there is a happy medium - a band I know and enjoy, doing something more ambitious and unique than they have before. It's almost like a new band entirely. Sometimes their changes lose me a little - like with Coldplay's and Ray LaMontagne's newest efforts. But sometimes, the band is The Decemberists. And sometimes, The Decemberists release a prog-rock concept album that is currently the greatest thing I have to listen to, and sometimes it is entitled The Hazards of Love.

That doesn't happen all the time, though.

This is the best concept album I have ever heard. This is perhaps the best example of story-telling I have ever come across in musical form.


Here's a very brief plot summary:
William is found as an infant by the Forest Queen, who saves him and turns him into a shape-shifter. He meets and falls in love with Margaret in the forest, but the Queen's not cool with that. A Rakish Man abducts Margaret with the assistance of the Queen, William saves Margaret, and they are together forever.

Here are some musical highlights:
A Bower Scene - The first hint towards how heavy the band is going to be. If you've historically listened to The Decemberists, be warned that this album has a heavy-metal flavour, and it's not afraid to use it.
Isn't It A Lovely Night? - There aren't many songs in the band's canon that compare to this one for saccharine sweetness. But I am at heart a sentimentalist, and if you don't feel the love between the star-crossed, you won't feel much of anything - it's a love story, people!
The Wanting Comes In Waves/Repaid - It's got harpsichord, it's got hopefulness... and then. Oh, then. We get our first chance to hear the sorceress Queen. I've established that she is villainous, and the guitar riff is badass enough to underscore that - but it pales in comparison to the chilling, eerie vocal power of the Queen. To put it in terms of Disney villains, she sounds like something that Ursula and the Queen of Hearts would have nightmares about. Close your eyes, and she might look like the Queen from Snow White, but the size of Jafar-as-Genie.
The Rake's Song - This is the album's most radio-friendly song, which explains its being the single. As far as character sketches go, I don't know how Colin Meloy does it. The Rake is so callous, brazen, and sneering, you'll want to punch him out but you'll be afraid he'll knife you if you try. Let me just say that he kills children. You're welcome.
The Queen's Rebuke/The Crossing - The Queen is back, and I have a weakness for how raw her musical themes are. If you know my listening habits, you'll know I don't listen to heavy metal - maybe Sabbath, in infrequent doses. But if you want or need to headbang, crank this shiz up. And you won't be able to NOT rock out.
The Hazards of Love 3 (Revenge!) - Don't listen to this just before going to bed, and for GOD'S SAKE, do not listen to this just before going swimming. Those kids that I talked about? The dead ones? Um... they're back. Give your imagination free rein and let yourself go mad. Just a side-note: waltz-time is the best way to sound creepy as hell.
The Hazards of Love 4 (The Drowned) - Lyrically wisftul conclusion to this love story - while my first instinct is to look for a big, theatrical ending more suited to the epic nature of the album's internal tracks, I'm suddenly reminded that this is a love story. If I had human tear glands, they may very well activate at this point.

Musically, The Hazards of Love breaks out of The Decemberists' usual weaponry. Guitarist Chris Funk channels Yes! axe-man Peter Howe, and Jenny Conlee wails on the Hammond organ like she pulled a Rip van Winkle at a Deep Purple concert, and woke up in the studio. The guitars are crunchier and more effected than I have perhaps ever heard on a Decemberists record. I am nothing but impressed that these geek-rockers can pull the metal stuff off when they need to.

Yes, the blogs (not this one, but the... y'know, reputable ones) and reviews are calling this album a prog-rock effort. And I can understand where they're coming from, I suppose. It is characteristic of progressive rock to weave songs and albums into large, overarching storylines. But when I think of prog, I think of bands like Rush, Coheed & Cambria, and The Mars Volta - namely, those with heavy metal influence throughout. What The Decemberists have done is take those heavy colourations and dress them with the folk-rock sound they have been perfecting for years. There is no denying the lyrical prowess of frontman Colin Meloy. The plot of this album is sort of dense and definitely poetically worded; it might take you a few listens to get the finer touches. This goes back to the point I made at the outset; when a band can give me what I've always liked about them, but somehow twist it so that I get new and different meanings all the time, then they have earned a fan.

I give this album 10 cloven-hooved satyrs out of 10. And I'm giving you all 2 days to buy the album and listen to it in its entirety, whereupon you shall return here and tell me what you think. Go here! Go now!

Conceptualizationalization (Like A Billion Points In Scrabble)

When's the last time you listened to a concept album? Do you know what a concept album is? Ok cool I'll tell you (captive audiences are the best audiences).
A concept album can be loosely defined as one with a theme carrying through the whole album - musically, lyrically, whatever. From there you can go in a couple of directions, with both - ahem - concept-album concepts... being popular these days. Here's how I would break them down:
Theme-based: The songs on the album could be as different from one another as on any other album, but be connected in even just one way. Maybe each title has a different state name in it, like Ray Charles' Genius Hits the Road in 1960. Or the band could be adventurous in the styles of song contained on the album, while the lyrics hint at a consistent idea - in the case of The Beach Boys' Pet Sounds, there is a lot of reflection on (Brian Wilson's) state of mind. There is a general sense of connection without being too restrictive to expression.
Story-based: I would consider these to be more aggressively creative. Rather than a vague commonality, this sort of concept album is dedicated to telling a story. The narrative is the driving force, and all aspects of the creative process are focused on propelling it. My favourite example of a plot-driven concept album is Pink Floyd's The Wall - it's dark, theatrical, and almost makes up for Roger Waters being a dick during the whole process.

So, I am so good at outlining what I want to get around to talking about, that I don't think I'll get around to the real point of this post until later. My friend Andrew inspired me - so if it doesn't pan out it's his fault.

The Decemberists. Hazards of Love. Coming up.

Listen to this in the meantime - for no reason whatsoever.

EPIC!

So, after listening to my roommate play "Go The Distance" on piano last night... I found the music video. And watched it at least 3 times. And felt so inspired to achieve something that it was a shame that it was 4 in the morning.

I don't know what it is about that song and others - seriously, I just watched half of it again after finding the link. I can't stop.

Sure, the lyrics are inspiring - if there are any, and the music makes you want to get up and DO shit. Here are some examples for when you're done reading. But the lyrics are also pretty kitschy, cliche, whatever you want to call it. And most of the time... the sentiment is fake.

Yes, old-movie guy. Fake like your credit rating. Happy Depression!

That is to say, the composers often aren't working from personal experience, reflecting on a monumental challenge in their life and deciding that an orchestra best suits their achievement. I don't think the band Europe has been to space.

But I guess that's a bit unfair on my part. However, I shall pose the question to you. Should an inspirational, you-can-do-it song be inspired by personal experience? Or is it alright to know what inspires people, and set that formula down as needed?
That'll do, Hercules. That'll do.

The Web Generation

First of all, if you know the person who invented exams, sit them down and have a good long chat, and ask them why. WHY?!

Now that that's out of the way... if you have a Twitter account, or maybe you've noticed on Facebook or elsewhere, that Ashton Kutcher and CNN's breaking-news feed are currently racing to see which will be the first to reach 1,000,000 followers. And it's going to go right down to the wire - follow the race here if you're so inclined. It's slow-motion suspense, amazing stuff. Besides lending strong credence to Twitter being the new fad, this race is also saying something else. Something that I think is more positive.

Here is Ashton talking earlier tonight about what he's apparently trying to say with this popularity contest. He's not the most eloquent speaker, and he still sounds like Kelso to me -

- but that's the point. He's not reading from a teleprompter - not only that, but he's right. Twitter's letting people filter their news for themselves, firsthand. You don't have to watch televised broadcasts or listen to syndicated radio or read newspapers anymore (though seeing those go under saddens me). Hell, you don't even have to follow CNN's Twitter feed if you'd rather go somewhere else. These social-networking sites are, like it or not, going to figure very heavily in the future of public discourse and information-sharing. I'm not saying you should get your news from Ashton Kutcher or, God forbid, Miley Cyrus, but you can choose. I could go into how this might be a bad thing - if you ask me to, maybe I will, O dedicated masses of readers. Just... if you're interested in the future of media and how the world is going to communicate, keep an eye on this story, it could be pretty significant.

But wait a minute, what does all this have to do with music? I am, after all, a one-trick pony here at Audiophonics, Inc. Well, in the spirit of this social-networking explosion we have on the Internet these days, I was directed to check out the YouTube Symphony Orchestra. And I was fully blown away.

Please watch this video before checking out the channel above. Yeah, I linked them in the wrong order - deal with it : )

I'm not going to say much, because I've talked and talked so much already. Just watch the videos on the channel - start at the beginning if you'd like. It's inspiring, it's impressive, it's a great song, and it's just about the best union of music and the Internet I have ever seen.

Enjoy!

Intermezzo: Virtual Babershop

Put on your headphones, go here, and prepare to have your mind blown.

And then imagine using this kind of sound recording in more action-packed scenes. Imagine a bank heist!

Intermezzo: Ooooooooohhhh....

Lookit! Lookit my new header! Thanks to my girlfriend Jessica for doing it up for me, since I'm pretty ham-fisted when it comes to visual arts. I knew there was a reason I kept her around.

*Don't tell her I said that... also, Jess, don't read what I just said. Dammit, that's probably not going to work.*

Anyway, busy studying for exams right now, but when I get a minute this week I'll talk about something.

In honour of Animal gracing my blog... My God, this is catchy.

iTunes Follow-Up

Props to my friend Paul for alerting me to this little article. I mentioned the iTunes music store creating a three-tier pricing system -- $0.99 for most songs, $1.29 for highly popular ones, and $0.69 for back catalogue, under-the-radar type songs. Weeeeell, that might be affecting sales in a way that the labels weren't looking forward to.

It sorta makes sense to me. Charging more for a song is bound to negatively affect its sales to a certain degree. And the ones that stay at the same price... well, they'll either see the same sorts of trends as before the new system was implemented, or even benefit from people being turned off the expensive tracks.

Of course, it's a bit early to make definitive statements - the store's only been under this new system for 6 days, as of Monday. But, as Paul told me, "it's definitely something to keep an eye out for."

So basically, Paul wrote this blog post. You should go ahead and read his blog, I'm just going to start parroting his stuff.

Now Playing: This isn't relevant, but I'm heavily digging it right now. And it is 99 cents, so... sure, it's relevant.

The Price Is Right - Or, It Was... Or WAS IT?!

Just a quick note to the dozens - nay, thousands - of you who are regularly reading this blog. Tomorrow, April 7th, will be of note to those of us who pay to download through Apple's iTunes Music Store. Whereas every one of the 10 million songs in the store's catalogue used to be available for the benchmark of 99 cents, we are now going to see an increase for chart-topping hits, and a decrease for back catalogue, off-Main-St. kinda songs.

Here's a business article about it.

Basically... if you read the tops of Billboard's charts and say, "That is what I will like now," you'll be paying $1.29 for the newest singles, the ones deemed more valuable by the record labels. The majority of tunes will remain at $0.99, and lesser-known or older songs will be reduced to $0.69.

I'm not that worried by this price change, because I'm not a pop-music trend-watcher, really. I'm not trying to be snobby by that. I just gravitate to the types of music that feel a bit less manufactured. I'm ok with the pop machine churning out hit songs by the book, because when I think of great Motown hits I'm fond of, that's what they were in the 60's - formulated to please the masses. This could turn into a whole reflection on the effect that time has on perception of "popular" music, but I have tonnes of essaying to do.

I will conclude with well-wishes for the record labels. They've been in a pretty bad mood for the last decade or so, and this pricing change might help them make sure their pillows are stuffed with straight cash money. After all, it's not their fault that they dismissed online music-sharing in favour of the CD market. Poor dears...

Anyway, I just thought you millions of readers should be kept up-to-date, because I know this is the only place you get your music news. Thank you for being loyal :D

Straight cash, homey.

Musings On Juno

What, this one?


Well, no. Although a post dedicated to ancient Roman deities would be fun. But I'm more familiar with Greek mythology (Orpheus = first rock star?) and in any case I'm not going to do that right now.

If you're into that kind of thing, Canada held its national music awards show, also known as the Juno Awards. I hope you watched it. If you didn't, I did a nice little irritating play-by-play on Twitter, which is pretty much like watching it, right? If you're wondering specifically what you missed, here are some thoughts and extrapolations of mine.

---

The show was two hours long (including commercials) but there were only 7 awards handed out. The non-televised gala event the night before saw 32 awards given, including Rock Album of the Year, Single of the Year, and Pop Album of the Year. While it was a bit of an odd balance for an awards show, I actually liked it. There was more emphasis on live performances, and that's more of a celebration of the year's music than some pats on the back.

That being said, the triple set of Serena Ryder, Crystal Shawanda, and Divine Brown doing a song each didn't do much for me. It all sort of washed over me as some well-formulated pop, so I guess I either need to investigate these people more (I'll forget) or be ok with not liking that style of music (I'm ok with that).

Whatever lighting trick they used for Sam Roberts' performance of "Them Kids" completely blew my mind. I also love that song, but I am convinced the stage lighting was the work of a mighty sorcerer. I didn't know we had any in Canada.

You know what else I didn't know we had in Canada? Loverboy. I honestly did not know they were Canadian, and I'm sorry for that. Giving them a lifetime achievement brought up the cheese factor for the show, but that's true of any such award.

On a personal note, it seems like every rock band that performed had a guitar in the same style as mine. Or mine is like theirs, more accurately. The semi-hollow guitar just looks beautiful and I'm glad I jumped on the right bandwagon.

No matter how many times I hear people tell me they absolutely hate Nickelback and have for years, they end up winning one award after another. I know I'm not buying their shallow pool of song-writing ability, but someone is. Enough people to net them Album of the Year among others. The real problem is that they also won the Fan's Choice award. So either the Nickelback-haters are lying, or not being vocal enough.

---

When all is said and done, though, the Juno Awards remain just that - an awards show. The accolades go to the artists who sell well, who play the pop-music game right and rake in the dollars. The Polaris Prize is a different animal altogether. They call themselves a "not-for-profit organization that annually honours, celebrates and rewards" Canadian bands, "without regard to musical genre, professional affiliation, or sales history". In other words, they just like good music, as chosen by an expert panel. So if the Junos and Grammies left a bad taste in your mouth - Nickelback? Seriously?! - then check out the Polaris. Also, Dallas Green agrees with you.

Oh yeah! I'm going to write about the CBC later. So stay tuned or whatever it is you do with blogs.

Listen. You can almost hear the leather pants.

Of The CBCC - The Extra 'C' Stands For 'Cuts'

So I just woke up and got out from that rock I was under, but apparently there's a recession going on? Thanks for telling me, people. Not only that, but it's causing job losses and budget cuts all over the world or something. Even in our most venerable institution, the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation.

Yes, it was announced on Wednesday that the CBC would be making significant cuts across its television and radio platforms. Prime-time T.V. shows like Being Erica and Little Mosque on the Prairie are being told to produce fewer episodes, while a number of shows, including radio spots The Point and Out Front, are being cancelled altogether.

Overall, there are 171 million dollars being trimmed and slashed from the CBC's programming roster. Over 800 jobs lost, with a number of small-town radio stations being shut down and staff being downsized nationwide. Amateur sports simply won't be broadcast anymore.

There's a lot to address here; some of it's economical, some of it's political, some of it's cultural. So I'm going to go ahead and break my thoughts up into three separate posts. And if I'm smart, I'll use those three topics. Otherwise I'm not planning this well.

SO! Coming up next week! Probably Monday but don't hold me to that because I am so so SO bad at updating regularly! Look for some musings on the economic side of this issue. There's no denying that we're all strapped for cash - does that make these cuts forgivable? And were they made in a responsible fashion?

TUNE IN NEXT WEEK! Goodness, I feel like I'm doing a T.V. promo. What an astute observation I've made.

Oh, right. Here's something to listen to, since spring is finally awaking and smiling.

Oh yes. Oh, yes.

It's A Computer! It's An Instrument!

First of all, never mind how long it's been since my last post. I'm not even gonna go there. School and plays and natural forgetfulness have all played their parts in getting us to here and now.

What's more important is that I just found out about the first annual Guthman Musical Instrument Competition, held at Georgia Tech on February 28th. Basically, tech-savvy - and maybe music-savvy, but not necessarily - people competed for lotsa money with the creation of unique electronic musical instruments.

I'm not huge on tech lingo, but I will let you have a look here and ogle. There are videos for most, audio samples, pictures, etc. Of particular interest to me are the following:

- The first-prize-winning Silent Drum, by Jaime Oliver;
- Hye Ki Min's lovely-sounding Sorisu. It combines music with electronics... and Sudoku;
- The vocal and versatile Toob from Arvid Tomayko-Peters. I think I'd have lotsa fun with that one;
- The Disc.o from Andrea Haider, which gives CDs new life in the music world;
- The showmanship of Thomas Gerhardt (aka DJ Porcelain and the Plates), in spinning plates and activating samples. It's like DJing on crack;
- The paper-and-ink wonder of Greg Kellum's Touch Plane. Frankly, I am more sympathetic to this one than to any of the others; and
- The future of the Blue Man Group, if they know what's good for them - D. Andrew Stewart and Joseph Malloch's T-Stick. A great blend of music and performance.

I should say, however, that none of these instruments are in any position to replace those that I know and cherish. The GuitarBot is a nice experiment, but there's no emotion whatsoever. And I really don't have anything good to say about MIDI approximations of guitar and piano sounds.

Regardless, some of these instruments are simply beautiful. It's nice to see technology going in a human direction sometimes. When people find a nice symbiosis between emotion and technology, the results can be remarkable.

What do YOU think?

Thanks, That Was Fun

Important music news, especially if you're Canadian and understand the history of pop music in this country. If you haven't heard already - which you should have by now, if you are of the aforementioned demographic (but I understand if you're busy; I know I damn well am) - the Barenaked Ladies have received a little shake-up in their membership. Or Steven Page left.

After 20 years as a songwriting duo, Page and Ed Robertson will no longer be dually writing songs anymore. The break comes with no (announced) hard feelings, and everyone is (officially) happily going their separate ways. More importantly, the Barenaked Ladies are not disbanding (I made a punny). Ed, Kevin Hearn, Jim Creeggan, and Tyler Stewart will still be going into the studio in April, touring later this year, all that.

But this is a big deal. And you can see that this band is a big part of my listening life here. They're one of the first bands I was made aware of when hanging out with my friends, around 12, when I think people start defining and internalizing their tastes in music. Listening to "Grade 9" when I was in Grade 7 didn't seem unusual to me - these were fun songs, played by fun guys. BNL are an institution in the history of Canadian pop music, and it's a shame to see one of the frontmen signing off.

This is where I want to make something clear. Page is not(or was not) the lead singer of the Barenaked Ladies. There were two lead singers - now there will be one, even though I'm predicting now that Kevin's role as a singer and songwriter will become even more pronounced in this new environment. But I've heard a lot of mention of BNL losing their leader, and I just don't think that's true. A major contributor? Absolutely. But I look forward.

Page has a new solo project out, called The Vanity Project. It's been largely co-written with British songwriter Stephen Duffy. This is good news, because here are some of the Page-Duffy contributions to BNL in the 90's:

I'll Be That Girl
Alcohol
Call and Answer
I Live With It Every Day
Jane
Alternative Girlfriend

3 of these were included in 2001's Disc One: All Their Greatest Hits. And a good friend of mine has highly recommended the album. On the other side, Robertson and Hearn have contributed their fair share to the catalogue, both individually and in partnerships with Page and each other. So I'm not worried about output from either side.

But this is huge, a point I've pretty much beaten into the ground. Jian Ghomeshi, host of CBC Radio's Q, took time out of his show on February 25th to underscore the gravity of the band's announcement. I think a lot of us, whether we love BNL or simply accept them, took them for granted as the band that would never die. And I'm not going to get hypocrtical now and decide to lament the loss of the band as a whole. But this is a fundamental shift in their make-up.

Anyway, don't mourn for too long. They're on amicable terms still, Steven left to pursue other things rather than as the result of a violent falling-out, and we can all keep our fingers crossed that there will be a reunion, however fleeting it may be.

For listening... well. Listen to all your favourite BNL tunes, from the wacky to the political. But I will take this opportunity to be poignant.

Don't let them see you cry.